Below are the 8 most recent journal entries recorded in mrfnsp's LiveJournal:

Wednesday, November 7th, 2007
10:21 pm	I need a good tryst. Tryst is a really good word. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 1st, 2006
10:35 am	Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? A: Whereas the party of the first part, also known as "Lawyer", and the party of the second part, also known as "Light Bulb", do hereby and forthwith agree to a transaction wherein the party of the second part (Light Bulb) shall be removed from the current position as a result of failure to perform previously agreed upon duties, i. e. the lighting, elucidation, and otherwise illumination of the area ranging from the front (north) door, through the entryway, terminating at an area just inside the primary living area, demarcated by the beginning of the carpet, any spillover illumination being at the option of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) and not required by the aforementioned agreement between the parties. The aforementioned removal transaction shall include, but not be limited to, the following steps: The party of the first part (Lawyer) shall, with or without elevation at his option, by means of a chair, step stool, ladder or any other means of elevation, grasp the party of the second part (Light Bulb) and rotate the party of the second part (Light Bulb) in a counter-clockwise direction, this point being non-negotiable. Upon reaching a point where the party of the second part (Light Bulb) becomes separated from the party of the third part ("Receptacle"), the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall have the option of disposing of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) in a manner consistent with all applicable state, local and federal statutes. Once separation and disposal have been achieved, the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall have the option of beginning installation of the party of the fourth part ("New Light Bulb"). This installation shall occur in a manner consistent with the reverse of the procedures described in step one of this self-same document, being careful to note that the rotation should occur in a clockwise direction, this point also being non-negotiable. Note: The above described steps may be performed, at the option of the party of the first part (Lawyer), by any or all persons authorized by him, the objective being to produce the most possible revenue for the party of the fifth part, also known as "Partnership." (Comment on this)
Wednesday, January 18th, 2006
10:25 am	While at the Registrar's Office, I ran into a freshman I know from Mock Trial. I played pong with her at the very end of last term, the Monday before I left because I needed someone to play with. We had a pretty good time and managed to hold table at Sig Ep for about 3 or 4 games. So anyway, we were talking and she said that one of her friends, who saw us play at Sig Ep, keeps bothering her to ask me if the random friend can play pong with me. Her words at the end? "So if you want to do a good deed, let me know." My response? "Blitz me and we'll see." So that in and of itself is weird. But then by the time I got to Collis and had gotten some food and was sort of chuckling about it, I realized, is this what I'm going to be known for? Do people really want to hang out with me because I can hit a ball into a cup full of beer? And I'm just now thinking: It's college, so does it really matter? Probably not, but I had to overreact in my head. Also, as much fun as one on two shrub, mini-social, and one on one water games are, they make the next morning before drill a bitch. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, January 16th, 2006
6:39 pm	Yesterday I got an invitation from Omaha Steaks. They really want me to buy a ton of frozen meat (and not just steaks...burgers and such, too...) and get some free knives. I think I might do it for a certain Jigglypuff I know. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, January 4th, 2006
11:30 am	So far this journal has been a bit of a bummer. In response, I'm copying a Xanga entry I just wrote: So I completely neglected some work I had to do. And I'm doing it now, when I have a meeting with the person it's due for at 5 today. Damn it. King Kong was one of the scariest movies I've seen in a while. Not the whole thing, just certain scenes. If you saw it, you know which. I want to see Chronicles of Narnia again. And I love my new headphones. Seriously, for real. I had no class today. My one class I'll have on Wednesdays is an x-hour. Sweet. Of course, I have class tomorrow starting at 9. Also, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Thanks Uncle Richard: The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing of one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's (2005) winners: 1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period. 2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole. 3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. 4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly. 5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. 6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid. 7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high. 8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it. 9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. 10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness. 11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. 12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer. 13. Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you. 14. Glibido: All talk and no action. 15 Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. 16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web. 17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out. 18. Caterpallor (n.):The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating. (Comment on this)
Thursday, December 29th, 2005
9:17 pm	I think I've finally cracked. So I came to a major realization today: I will never live in New York again. For anyone who knows me at all, this is a huge realization. I grew up on Long Island and loved it. When I moved to Florida freshman year of high school, I missed it and wanted nothing more than to return. I had idolized it. I realized that a while ago, but still like it. I'm a proud East Coast, Northeast, New York, Long Island boy. I loved what it represents and am very proud of where I come from. But as we were driving down the rainy highway with a peppy cousin I'd just met in the backseat, on our way to visit my paternal grandmother that I've only seen twice in her Medicare/Medicaid covered nursing home, I realized there is just too much pain here. There are too many bad memories I've suppressed or twisted into something good. It will never be what I thought it was/is/might one day be. It'll always just be the place with good food where my Dad grew up in severely broken home and nearly shot his brother. It'll always be the place where my mother realized her mother was maniacal at the age of seven and then watched her secret half-sister be drawn in and broken from the perfect kindergarten teacher to a corrections officer in a dysfunctional relationship (something we all seem to have and I wonder if I'm doomed to...a major part of the reason I don't really put myself out there. I'm afraid of an imperfect relationship and will of course find nothing else). When I come back here or speak to someone who I grew up with here, I become a me that I don't like and never have. I can't move on until I officially move away, never to return. I thought about where I can go. There is too much pain in Florida and South Carolina, too, but not as much. I was better at closing off my emotions then. Dartmouth seems to be a relatively safe harbor, as does D.C. But is the whole east coast tainted for me? Will I have to move to South Carolina. I truly wondered today whether the only way I could grow was to move to England, a literal ocean away. The cause of this incredibly revealing, uncharacteristic, and cathartic rant? I met one of my cousins today. The first thing we did was take family pictures. Family Pictures. I've never had any of my immediate family. A little back story seems appropriate. I grew up only knowing my maternal great-grandmother (since passed), maternal grandmother, and my mother's half-sister (which, by the way, the half-sister doesn't know). My grandmother married twice, both divorced fairly quickly. I was told growing up that my father's family were 'bad people'. From what I know understand, it was mostly my maternal grandmother's doing. She's a great guilter and the cause of much pain this particular vacation. So it went, and I thought about it less and less. Then my parents got divorced. One day, we just went to his parent's house. I met another unmarried aunt and my grandparents. I don't even know what to say about how awkward it was. I don't know what I expected, but I certainly didn't get it. My dad started telling us stories we never heard about him when he was younger and about his family (see gun threatening above - that uncle is also an ex-convict). I found out about cousins I have, cousins I always really dreamed of having. Then I find out my grandfather died and I felt nothing, but then I felt like shit for feeling nothing. Then all of the sudden, my older brother and father (both still in NY) go on a family kick, meeting all of these people. I actually only now vaguely remember meeting someone I believe was my father's aunt (?). So they met some cousins or something. Well, today I did, too. We met her at a mall in Bay Shore. And we took pictures. We sat next to each other like we did every year. The woman in the store kept calling them family pictures. How do you have insta-family? Add three drops of water, an awkward intro, 5 portraits, and bam, you're done? I just couldn't take it. I just sat there all day in a daze. I felt like a complete ass for being like that (because anyone who's ever met me knows I'm not shy). I just couldn't take all of the togetherness. Then, as a family activity, we go to visit grandma in the nursing home. We walked in and its the most depressing place I've ever been. All of the poor elderly people were just so helpless and you just knew that it was a place where people go to wait for death. So I saw my grandmother for the third time, the second time in a nursing home/hospital (the last was two years ago or last year on Christmas after she had a heart attack). She barely recognized my father and obviously didn't know us. So we sat there for an hour, talking, while she looked at us and marvelled at our size. I wished she knew who the hell I was and that she never met me at the same time. We finally got out of there, got pizza, and ate at my brother's new apartment for more family time. I just can't handle knowing that there are people out there that I should have grown up with, who should have come to my graduation, who's weddings and graduations I should have attended. Sometimes I think that it would really just be best to cut myself off from all of my family and just go. Go somewhere, far away, not look back, and I don't even know what. I've very recently believed that I should go see a psychiatrist. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, December 26th, 2005
7:36 am	So while I do keep a xanga, there are certain people whom I know will not read this as they do not know it exists. I pose a question. Is it irrational to desire to see someone on a particular day and claim that only that day matters? Example? We didn't go to my grandmother's on Christmas, instead doing something with our father. She is really pissed even though we're coming over her house TODAY. Does that make any sense? (PS, since we weren't coming over on Christmas, she said seeing us on Christmas Eve would suffice...So one day before, why not on after?) There's more to this saga, to be posted, but I don't have the time now. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, December 14th, 2004
10:22 am	You wish you were this cool. Okay, so I keep a Xanga, mostly because it's better than livejournal. Also, I don't have enough time for two journals. Here you go: http://xanga.com/mrfnsp (1 Comment |Comment on this)